TRU

I wrote this post shortly after Dave stepped down as Pastor at TRU. It was too raw to publish then. Since then, we have very much felt the loss of TRU. We still get together with some of our TRU family but not all of them. I miss singing on the worship team. A lot. Both rehearsals and Sunday mornings. I miss being a part of the Welcome team. And I miss Sunday mornings. Everyone so happy to see each other, checking in on each other, sharing burdens.

We’ve started attending another church but nothing will ever be TRU.

Six years ago, Scott and I were sitting every Sunday morning at Westview Community Church going through the motions. We sat in the same spot by the same people. We looked forward to seeing them and greeting them. We always promised we’d get together with them but never did. We sang the songs and listened to the sermons and put our tithe in the plate when it went by.

Over the years, we learned a lot about God and grew in our faith. We went on mission trips, internationally and disaster relief. I taught Sunday school and led some women’s Bible studies. I became involved in Homestead minisitries. We raised our family in the church, had them attend Sunday school and the service weekly.

When we first met Dave, we weren’t sure what to think. We loved his style of worship. I had become critical in my spirit of the worship at Westview and didn’t like that in myself. So when the concept of planting a church came up and was talked about more in a Sunday school led by Dave, we jumped on it.

The core group grew as the vision grew. It would be something different. No more playing at church. No more going through the motions. We would reach people where they were, in a vastly unchurched area. The core group began meeting in our home.

Around the same time, Scott and I started a small group in our home. We had a couple from TRU, a couple who were friends of ours, and a former Homestead gal and her baby daddy who attended. We had a meal together and talked about God and the Bible and grew together. We came alongside one of the couples as they struggled with their meth addiction.

When TRU started, Scott and I were all in. He began in the children’s ministry teaching the kids. I ran the Welcome team. We loved TRU. So many hurting, broken, addicted people came seeking hope. Lives were changed.

After a couple of years, I had the opportunity to sing with Dave. I absolutely loved it. Dave worked tirelessly with me to teach me to harmonize and blend with his voice. A year later, Scott joined us. We loved our Thursday night dinners and rehearsals at our house. We also loved the Saturday practices at the church after set up. Mom on the keyboards, Travis on the guitar, Josh or Dave on the bass, Josh or Darren on drums. Sometimes also Bobby on guitar too. We laughed and joked and had a blast. Early on Jandi joined us sometimes and then later Labarbara and Darryl. We even joined the band a few times in either Travis or Josh’s garage for rehearsal. Wayne and Fred were often setting up chairs at Saturday rehearsal and then either Jason or Matthew were on the sound board. I have such precious memories of all of these times with these people. We were a family, real and raw and unedited.

Sunday mornings, Scott and I drove to West Manhattan to pick up mom, later also picking up Labarbara on the way, then over to north Manhattan to pick up Adelle, then off to St. George by 830. Warming up vocally in the car was always fun. We used to do actual vocal warm ups from you tube, but later had a rotation of Jason Mraz, Michael Buble, Chris Stapleton and Midwest Meets Manhattan songs we sang in the car. Sometimes we sang the actual worship songs we’d sing that Sunday. Everyone’s moods were right there in the mornings, including Labarbara’s talkative moods, my shortness, mom’s ditziness, Scott’s slothlikeness, and Adelle always with her headphones on listening to her own thing.

After awhile, TRU felt like other church. Going through the motions. Playing church. People came “dressed” for church. When they’d ask how you were, and you’d say you were struggling, the answer was, “Oh, I’ll pray for you,” with a look like, “Its church, why would you say that?” Even worship, though fun, sometimes felt more like a performance than a time of praise. At least in my spirit. Tear down became a burden rather than an act of service. More “church” people came and less hurting, broken people. Or if they were hurting, they hid it behind church masks. People started getting in their holy huddles, cliques, who knew what info. We were also guilty of that.

I do have a lot of memories of great celebrations and get togethers with the core team and others, getting to know awesome people. People loved and accepted Adelle. For the most part. There were those who complained when she, too, didn’t act quite like a church person was supposed to act.

I have believed in and supported TRU for six years with my time, support, talent and heart. I really wanted something different to happen there. It did then it didn’t. I love Jesus with all my heart but I really don’t think His focus was having people come to church. His focus was to offer hope.

For now, we plan to take a break from all church. And maybe we can find a way to start something that offers the hope of Jesus that isn’t church. But for now, we will rest.

I will treasure the good times at TRU. And miss parts of it. I really hope to keep in touch with those who shared their true hearts with us. And I will pray for TRU.